This is the dialogue for Riddle School

Mr. Kahm's classEdit

  • Phil: *grooooan...*.
  • Phil: I've been sitting here for two hours straight listening to addition facts.
  • Phil: All because I teased somebody, I'm in a special class.
  • Phil: I don't even have a smart teacher.
  • Phil: Right now I'm as free as a bird in a bird cage.
  • Phil: Alright, that's it. I'm getting out of this school.
  • Kahm: What's 131+42 again? I forget.
  • Phil: *groooooooan*.
  • [Clicking on power outlet]
    • No outlet here!
  • [Clicking on left window]
    • During school, even the windows look dreary.
  • [Clicking on right window]
    • That window's no different from its twin.
  • [Clicking on crack]
    • I know for sure this room was never on a designer show.
  • [Clicking on large crack]
    • You can tell this school's low-budget just by looking at that.
  • [Clicking on Mr. Kahm]
    • That's the teacher, Mister Kahm.
    • He asks me lots of questions because he doesn't know any of the answers.
  • [Clicking on south]
    • The teacher may not be smart, but he knows when I open that door.
  • [Clicking on sharpener]
    • Phil: That's it!
    • Phil: Hey teacher! Could I sharpen my pencil?
    • Kahm: Only one person at a time!
    • Phil: Now that was sharp! (I can't believe I said that.)

Mr. Kahm hall sectionEdit

  • [Clicking on exit doors]
    • The school doors are shut during school hours.
    • I bet the principal has the keys.
    • I went there yesterday, and then I got sent to that class...
    • ...Only last time, I was with the teacher.
    • It'll be harder this time. I don't even have a hall pass.
    • There's a hall guard right before you reach the hall's end.
    • Well, it's all the way down the hall and past the teacher's lounge.
    • If I can make it there, I'm as good as free!
  • [Clicking on door]
    • NO WAY.
  • [Clicking on exit sign]
    • It's the EXIT sign. It represents sweet freedom!
  • [Clicking on bell]
    • To whom the bell doesn't toll...
    • rings when school ends.
    • ...which it doesn't. Ever.
    • Need I say more?

Ms. Cophey hall sectionEdit

  • [Clicking on clock]
    • It's a clock.
    • It's also a reminder that I waste all my time at school.
    • That explains why I never pay attentions to clocks anymore.

Ms. Cophey's classEdit

  • [Clicking on window]
    • Looking out there reminds me I'm trapped here.
  • [Clicking on art]
    • There's a drawing by someone named JonBro.
  • [Clicking on Ms. Cophey]
    • That's my teacher, Miss Cophey, who drinks more coffee than anyone I know.
    • She finishes teaching lessons two hours early in a hard-to-understand jittery voice.
  • [Clicking on Phred]
    • That's Phred, my best friend and the most bored class member.
  • [Clicking on Zack]
    • That's Zack, who is always very cold. He has no problem freezing the water fountain.
  • [Clicking on Smiley]
    • That's Smiley. She's the only one in the school who likes learning.
    • Smiley's also the one I made fun of to be in that special class.
  • [Clicking on trash can]
    • Wow, feather duster in a dustbin. Ironic.
  • [Clicking on trash can again]
    • The only stuff I see in there is useless trash.

Janitor's Closet hall sectionEdit

  • [Clicking on puddle]
    • You don't know want to know what happened there.

Janitor's ClosetEdit

  • 808: WHAT are you doing?
  • [Using feather duster on 808]
    • 808:You found my feather duster! Keep the change.
    • 808: I've been looking all over school for this.
    • 808: The playground birds needed dusting.
    • 808: Well, I gave you a dollar. Don't waste it on socks.
  • [Clicking on 808]
    • That's the janitor. He's 5's dad, 808.
  • [Clicking on mop]
    • That's a mop. It works like a towel.
  • [Clicking on broom]
    • I ate one of those for lunch yesterday.
  • [Clicking on bucket]

Phil: Uh, Bucket, you spilled something.

Men's BathroomEdit

  • [Clicking on messy stall]
    • That's the only stall the guys ever use, mainly for graffiti.
  • [Clicking on clean stall]
    • That's the untouched stall which is in perfect condition and currently on display.
  • [Clicking on sink]
    • As crazy as it sounds, those are sinks. Just look at the sleek design!
    • I would have thought twice about escaping school if it all was that cool-looking.

Women's Bathroom hall sectionEdit

  • Richy: Hey, it's me, Richy, the hall guard. Got a hall pass?
  • Richy: 'cause if you don't, you can't pass.
  • [Using hall pass on Richy]
    • Yes, yes I do, so please get out of my way.
  • [Clicking on women's bathroom]
    • Listen, if I went in there, you'd hear screaming and shrieks, not only from anyone in there, but from me.

Poster hall sectionEdit

  • [Clicking on poster]
    • That's a poster I made at home because of the bizarre number of lockers in this school.
    • "This school has 7 students and more than 50 lockers! NO SANITY!"
    • No wonder this school's so low-budget. It's expected to be popular.

Teacher's Lounge hall sectionEdit

  • Chubb: Oooooh...gimme a cookie.
  • [Clicking on Chubb]
    • That's Chubb. There's not a person I know who's as fat and hungry as him.
    • Yesterday I heard something about him swallowing his refrigerator.
  • [Clicking on fire extinguisher]
    • I think I'm safe. The last fire we ever had was when Mrs. Cophey's coffee spontaneously combusted.
  • [Using dollar on Chubb]
    • Take the dollar, fatty.

Cafeteria hall sectionEdit

  • [Clicking on exit doors]
    • Getting out of school through that door's out of the question.


  • [Clicking on vending machine]
    • The cookie-vending machine is unfortunately broken.
  • [Clicking on Greg]
    • That's Greg, the least hungry and most restful student in the school.
  • [Clicking on blueprint]
    • That's a diagram of the cafeteria, reminding us all what it all looked like clean.
  • [Clicking on blueberry Wet-Ade]
    • Someone managed to spill their blueberry Wet-Ade up there.
  • [Clicking on heck if I know]
    • That's green, unrecognizable gunk.
  • [Clicking on infamous mustard smudge]
    • That's the school-famous Smiley smudge.
    • That's how I made fun of Smiley--with mustard.

Teacher's LoungeEdit

  • Teacher: What are you DOING in here?!
  • I need to talk to the principle.
    • Teacher: And why is THAT?
    • It's an emergency!
      • Teacher: THEN GO TO THE BATHROOM!
    • I want to tell him a joke.
      • Oh, jokes are always fun! Go right on in.
    • My teacher sent me up.
      • Teacher: GET OUT!
    • Never mind.
  • Standing.
    • Teacher: GET OUT!
  • What teacher are you?
    • Teacher: That's none of your business!
    • Teacher: GET OUT!
  • Wrong room.

  • Teacher: How nice of you to drop by.
  • Teacher: Bye, then!

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